I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
