Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize
