Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
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