Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize
