would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
