theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize