im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
