This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
