At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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