They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
His hands were made for my vagina.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
