Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I can't put those talents on a resume
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
