All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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