Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
