Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
