Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize