she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
