so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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