Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Randomize
