it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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