D3 body, D1 cock
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
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