I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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