The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
