Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
You smell like stripper and shame
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
