your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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