like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Randomize
