so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Randomize
