Christians are straight up FREAKS
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
A+ Viking dick
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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