this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
