I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
