Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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