Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
