If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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