he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Randomize