Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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