does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
