Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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