...so i touched it.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
