I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
