well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
