weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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