Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
