Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
