and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
