You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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