Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
