love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
