Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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