Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
