so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
