Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
